Job searching, not really.

 June 16th of 2021 was my last at Hermiston High School. Also, the last day of what could be my last teaching position. At 64, I am too young to retire fully. Too young for Medicare/Medicaid. Too old, in my mind to go back to a profession that has told me that I can't teach. Ok, they never said I can't teach, just that I cant' engage students. I do not disagree with that, especially when I am teaching a subject, Economics, that I find anachronistic. I did find some of the things within Economics interesting and I see how knowing some things could students in their coming years understand how dependence on a a free market system can hurt the 99%. But teach it in that way and you could get a slap from your administration, trust me. Of course I live and taught in a MAGA central part of my state which stays ever so red, despite the light to dark blue rest of the state. That is a battle cry of this side of my state, impeach our liberal Governor, impeach Biden, restore the order that was dictated by the former President. 

I was always open with my students, I'm a Democrat, though in many things I am a bit more moderate than many. Is that a circumstance of my birth? I am a Libra, lady justice, or maybe more rightly the lady of balance. I was teaching CRT (Critical Racial Theory) before it became the mantra of evil by conservatives. I still believe my lack of engagement of my students was the excuse, though my attempt at balance in teaching Civics was the real reason. Can't really say that teaching truth is reason for dismissal. Well, not in my state anyway.

Here I am 5 months out and still I haven't found the position that calls to me. I am too old to take a position in a district where I am not really wanted. There are many positions available because of teacher burnout, but do I want a position in a district that would do that to its faithful teachers? In my previous post, 5 months ago, I listed a variety things that cause teachers to leave. My former district lost many teachers because of its lack of care for teachers either pregnant or with small children. Other reasons as well, maybe because they couldn't engage their students. But speculation is rumor without facts and I love me some compelling facts. I have none, other than those that involve me. And I can make a guess that our facts about my dismissal are not agreed upon. 

As my retirement nest egg dwindles I am looking at my options. I really think research is my area of expertise. I suck at the presentation, on that I agree with my former district. My anxiety in crowds and meeting new people is crippling. COVID hasn't helped me one bit, though I still think I was ok in CDL and just as good as many of my colleagues, according to them. But I am not a coach, all of my colleagues in my department are and the person who was hired to replace me is also a coach. Ok, he didn't take my job technically, my colleague who was teaching US History, moved into my Civics/Economics position and the new guy got his job. The irony here, is that when I was told I being involuntarily transferred I said I had never taught in regular classroom, always alternative ed, and that I had never taught Economics. At the time I was working on a Masters in American History. My theory is that they were hoping I would resign and move on to another position. They were caught and well when they looked closer at me, they saw someone who didn't do well in a regular classroom setting and began looking for a way to get me out. This could all be paranoia on my part, but I do know I struggled daily with just coming to work each morning for two years, because of my anxiety and the help I was getting from coaches wasn't geared to making me better at engagement, but at preparing lesson plans which they believed would make me a better teacher. My saying this is really hard for me was translated as you need to tighter lesson plans, post your learning goals so that students know what they are learning and adults coming in know what you are teaching. I was sick more in the two years I was teaching in a regular classroom, than I was in the last 7 years. Exposure to twice as many students notwithstanding, anxiety and my inability to get through it was the reason.

I am trudging on ever so slowly and hopefully there will be something somewhere for me to settle into.

Working people

 A recent Washington Post article, Must Reads by T,J, Ortenzi, 6/13/2021, gave the following summation of what most workers want, yes better pay but also,

I know of teachers around Oregon and likely the United States who have left positions they have had for several years for a district that provides child care. In our recent chaos, new parents had to make decisions about staying home with a newborn and taking a leave from their teaching because the district refused to accommodate them. It was CDL afterall, why shouldn't a new parent be able to stay home. But in some districts all teachers were expected to come to the school building and do their CDL from their classrooms. Which made the decision for most teachers, stay home do CDL from home for 2/3 pay. Pregnant? Yes, you must attend PLCs in person with your PLC partners, everyone is wearing masks. 

And that is just teachers, I have no idea the impact on other professions. Teachers were expected to give grace to their students, understand how hard this for the students. Yes, yes we know it's hard for you, but no grace for you. Have a difficult time with CDL? Here's the PD for that and now you are fixed and will do better. Engagement a problem? That's on you for not energizing your lessons. 

I personally had a real issue with recognizing students once we got back to in person teaching. I was totally face blind. If a student didn't sit in their assigned seat I marked them absent, because well I couldn't tell who was where most of the time. I was not one of those teachers who marked a student absent because they weren't sitting their designated seat. If I marked a student who was present absent, that was all on me.

I'll be moving on at the end of this school year, in fact only three days left this school year. I have not found a new position yet and thankfully, I have a small nest egg that can carry me for a bit. I will not allow desperation to rule my choices. I will find what I believe to be the best fit for me. I rely on the district I may enter to decide that I am the best fit.

No. 1. Workers want and need child-care options

Many parents don't have full-time schooling options and paying for child care can be very expensive so for some, “there's a calculation that financially, it makes more sense for them to to stay home with their kid, even if they have access to part-time schooling,” Rosenberg said.

This point, like the others on the list, is anecdotal because “there's a substantial lag between what's happening now and the official data analysis,” he said.

Last June, economics correspondent Heather Long cited a lack of child care as one of the biggest things holding back a U.S. recovery. 

Lockdowns may have eased, but child care can be prohibitively expensive. The cost hit an all-time high in 2020, rising 2.2 percent as the economy cratered, according to the Bureau of Economic Analysis.

No. 2. Workers want a nimble safety net and consistency

After this week's story published, Rosenberg talked to a California restaurant owner who had been reaching out to former employees to ask what it would take to get them back to work.

The man said his former employees weren't “lazy” or trying to “milk the system” but had faced so many issues trying to enroll in unemployment benefits that they were wary of returning to workplaces that could easily be shut down again because of another outbreak or lockdown. 

State agencies that administer unemployment benefits have had huge delays, Rosenberg said. And like employees told the business owner: Why risk getting off employment when, six weeks from now, dining restrictions could return and suddenly they're trying to get back on the unemployment system again?

No. 3. Workers want more of a say

Before the pandemic, there was “increased momentum” in labor organizing, Rosenberg said. That didn't translate into substantial enrollment for the nation's unions during the pandemic, but it meant that people were more aware of workers’ asks for safety and greater income equality. 

Last day for Seniors and my last day part 1

 As my seniors walked into class today, I considered my last day of high school. I totally remember it because I had broken my flipper. What is a flipper you ask? Well it is molded thing with one front tooth attached to it. I lost one of my permanent front teeth going down a slide into a pool, going down the "wrong" way and smacking my mouth on the edge of the slide before slipping into the water. Blood everywhere, no I didn't pass out, but mouth swelled up and for some reason the family I was with put an ice pack on it and waited for my mom to pick me at the end of the day. Boy was my mom pissed. Anyway, that delay cost me the tooth, so for all of my middle school years and part of my high school years I had braces with a spacer to keep the space open until the braces came off. I didn't smile in pictures for any of those years. 

Finally my braces came off and I was fitted with a flipper that had a tooth on it. It was annoying and my last day of school I dropped my flipper in the sink and broke off the tooth. I was not going to my last day of school with a hole in my mouth so the orthodontist temporarily glued the flipper back together and I went to my last day of school. 

As I watch my seniors file in for this last day of school, they get to complete watching the movie Home, I think about what their next steps will be. I think about what my next step will be. Will I swallow my anxiety and take the offered Robo interview with an online school that if offering a yearly paycheck so low that I can't live on it. Nearly 50% lower than my current salary. It is with an online school and I am guessing they are thinking that those who apply have a full time teaching job and this one will be a side job. Not for me, not yet anyway. So do I swallow my anxiety and do the interview to the best of my ability? Or do I just ignore the offer of an initial interview? I just don't know at this point.

So this is my last day with students, my students. I fear that I will be stuck with covering for those teachers who are sick or doing whatever and need their classes covered. I hope not. I will begin taking down my posters and boxing the last of my stuff. Last day for me is the 16th. Bright spot is my granddaughters and a grand puppy will be visiting me that week. Then in about 4 or 5 weeks I will be bringing home a new puppy, Boudicca will join the demons and me. She is a silver lab. Yeah, I know, silver! Who knew? 

Critical thinking and Economics?

 In an act of positivity, which is turning towards the negative as I write, I have changed the name of my blog to Teacher and Grammy Tales. Positive because I know I am a good teacher, I would likely be better at a college because of my presentation style, I have been "teaching" for over 30 years. I know my content History and Civics. I find Economics tedious and unnecessary for high school students who are not going to be going into Business or Economics as a profession. 

Why is that? Full disclosure, I have a fear of Math that is somewhat lessened at the ripe old age of 63, learning what a Circular Flow Model is, what the four factors of production are, what the three basic questions of economic are, etc, etc. is not essential. It just isn't. I have been in conversations with Social Studies teachers about Economics and still, no I don't think knowing those things taught as they are where I teach or have taught teaches critical thinking about Economics. It is Math on a slight dose of steroids, but Math all the same. I wholeheartedly believe that Financial Literacy/Personal Finance should be taught, but not by Social Studies teachers. A semester of Finanical Literacy taught through the Math department by lovers of Math or Maths would give students so much more than what they are getting from the Social Studies Department. 

I realize that most states have standards mandating the teaching of Economics, which is where I was two years ago still not being convinced that Economics as it is currently taught and as it is in Oregon's standards is essential. No, I am not hedging here when I say ,"...as it is taught...." Integrate Economics into U.S. History, World History, and Civics. As a standalone all it is doing is taking up space that could be devoted to critical thinking within the context of History and Civics. Maybe some districts and states do it differently and they do teach critical thinking, but I haven't seen it where I teach. It is purely here are the facts, a bit of why and then move on to the next concept. There is some integrating of the basic topics in Economics with each other, but very critical thinking. 

I have just spent 10 weeks over half in CDL, Comprehensive Distance Learning, and in person teaching the academics of Economics. The only concept that students have even a slight grasp of is The Basic Economic Questions, What to produce, how to produce it, and who will buy it. But they can't think critically about those questions. With the context of systems of governments I believe they could begin that process.

For the last week and a half we have been going over Budgets and Budgeting. At the most basic level they get it, you have to stay within a budget.  They understand the why and they understand that going into debt is bad and hard to dig yourself out of. As I wandered around YouTube looking for informative and entertaining videos I have found a set of videos created by Alux that pretty much says poor people are stupid and all they have to do is read/listen to the various books Alux promotes and they will be billionaires. Ok, it doesn't come and say that though the video we watched "15 things poor people waste their money on," does intro with "Where billionaires come...." My new teaching, oh wait admin says I don't know how to teach, goal is do my best to get my students to think critically about all of the Personal Finance/Financial Literacy videos out there. 

I am thinking to begin is to teach some History of Poverty first, from the mouths of historians and maybe economists. Then moving on to videos, self help and not so much help. 

https://youtu.be/-c6115s_Rs4

Chelsea is my new Personal Finance guru. Ok, I've only watched the video I posted here, but still. I have met my personal goal of moving from the negative to the positive in one post! Rant at you later.

The Pandemic boon and not so much

 

Yes, the pandemic was a boon to this woman who has extreme crowd anxiety. A boon and also a back-slide, I have been able to avoid crowds or to put it more distinctly I am in charge of when I engage with others in person. Now with going to “Hermiston Hybrid,” my anxiety is increasing. But I will endure and I will do my best not to inflict it on my students. I have had only three students say they are considering not coming back to in person. I wish instead of dropping all four grades into this “hybrid” situation they had started with 9-10 for two weeks and then moved to adding 11-12. Having all four grades moving about the building, plus staff, should have a learning curve. All of this is dependent on our metrics, though our Governor has said all schools need to move to in person in some fashion by mid April.

While I cannot say that I flourished and thrived under the restrictions of the Pandemic, I did relax. I read and webinared my free time and learned so much about Civics and History. So much that I couldn’t use it with my students because my two Civics/Economics colleagues though both younger and in the profession fewer years than I had the blessing of the admin to arrange, I won’t say dictate, the what and when of both Civics and Economics. I was allowed some input, but my expertise when asked for was ripped apart by the former lawyer each time. So I stopped, I stopped not because I was wrong or had things turned around I stopped because his rapid fire questions never allowed me to think my answers through. After waiting a short time he would begin to  rephrase the same question for me and if I began to talk before he was done, “I hope you don’t do that students. Or I am still talking.” Loudly and angrily. I always wanted to say back, “Is that how you talk to your students?” But my nature does not allow me to be so extrovert, my pathology keeps me from defending myself when confronted with males and some women who see me as below them, allow their misperception of my silence as stupidity or worse acquiescence. It is obvious to me that what I need to do is get all this negative out of me. I start writing a piece and it inevitably begins to get more and more negative. So I stop. Pack that piece away and in a few days move on to something else. I have been trying to write in my old blog every day or at least a few times a week. I will have to continue to do that, to flush bits of negativity out and hopefully to also bring some joy back to my writing.

The Pandemic, time to relax?

 According to an Education Week article, "Rising Numbers of Educators Say Pandemic is now blown out of proportion, Survey says." 

"... nearly 1 of every 3 educators surveyed last month expressed that view."

I have a tendency to hypervigilant. I blame my mother. She was a hypochondriac and would have likely walled herself into the house and requested me to deliver her groceries after, of course, sanitizing everything.

I am not that, but I do worry about students coming to school sick. It's the nature of the beast for some of them. School is important to them and they come sick or not. The other are students who can't seem to keep their masks on correctly, above the nose correctly. I haven't encountered one student who has been belligerent about pulling up their masks. Sometimes there is complaining, but they do it. And I usually either make a general comment about mask wearing or make eye contact and point to my mask and nose.

I appreciate that, they get it and reluctantly comply with the ask. Adults are, well, not so compliant. I went into Walmart the other day and saw family that ran the gamut from no mask to fully masked. It was entertaining and I really wanted to ask them for a picture, but I was afraid the guy would have a fit and I am not up for fits. I'll watch them on Facebook or TV, but not be a party to them in person.

Many educators and school staff are fully vaccinated. Some school staff have refused for whatever freedom of speech reason. I am fully vaccinated and I wear a mask. I am told you can still get the virus, just not as severe so I wear my mask. I have a hoard of masks. I went kind of crazy, after having difficulty getting cute ones early on in the Pandemic, I discovered a slew of cute ones and I have enough to wear one every day for at least a month.

I am more relaxed, just not totally just yet. 

Engaging Students and me

 This is my Achilles Heal, my rolling the stone up the hill endlessly. For over 30 years I have worked hard to know my content. I have paid 1000s of dollars for workshops, webinars, etc that my various admins would not pay for to learn about History. All kinds of History, I saw a course or a workshop that had History content that looked interesting, I took that course or workshop. I am still very very shy of a Masters degree, I've tried twice once in the mid 90's an Interdisciplinary Studies degree to combine my Language Arts and my Social Studies degrees, but I was too slow and the degree dissolved. So I began to focus on History only, History is my happy place. Recently actually attempting a Masters in American History, but my life upended, and I wasn't able to keep up the rigor needed. 

Back to engagement, my introverted nature is pathological. The Pandemic set me back decades. I felt very comfortable with the CDL format. Though I still had engagement issues. Of course other teachers keep telling me they had no clue if there were students behind those ubiquitous dots. But I was held to a standard developed before the shutdown and given little to no help from March 13, 2020 until the beginning of the 2020 2021 school year. No, even though they were out there, I didn't ask for help much at all. I went merrily along knowing in my heart that no matter what I did, I would not be coming back to my present district for 2021 2022 school year. Self-fulfilling, perhaps, but I was rarely told what I was doing right other than, "You really know your content." Yeah, I know that, I know more than you do you nut head. But content knowledge wasn't important, engagement was and I suck at it.